Winter Blessings Page 5

  “It’s noisy.” Katie Ann crumpled a paper napkin as she spoke. “And it’s a little tight in my room with the girls there.” She smiled. “But we did a lot of giggling last night. It will take some time to get used to having two people with me, along with two more dressers and a cot. Thankfully, my room is fairly large.” She smoothed out the napkin again. “Mei dat said he’ll get started on their haus as soon as he can in the spring. This will be temporary. I love mei bruderskinner. It’s just an adjustment.”

  “Just like it would be for Ephraim and me if he’d consider what I suggested.” Mandy rested her chin on her palm as guilt rained down on her. Maybe she’d made a mistake by suggesting they take another path. Had she not taken everything Ephraim might be feeling into consideration?

  She had to find a way to talk to him.

  “Hello.” Mandy stepped into Emma’s kitchen and set a container of lemon bars on the counter. “I brought you a special snack.”

  “Mandy!” Emma moved across the room’s expanse to meet her. “It’s so gut to see you. How are you?”

  She shrugged as she touched the container. “I’ve been baking a lot. Mei schweschder says it’s a coping mechanism.”

  “A coping mechanism?” Emma opened the container. “Oh my! Look at those lemon bars.”

  “Have one. They’re pretty gut.” Mandy leaned back against the counter. “I’m going to try a similar recipe later when I get home. I’ll bring you some.”

  Emma picked up a bar and then looked at Mandy. “What’s going on?”

  “You haven’t heard?” Mandy asked. When a meow sounded, she looked down. Hank was walking back and forth, rubbing against her shins. “Hi, Hank.”

  “I haven’t heard what?” Emma asked.

  “Ephraim and I broke up.” Mandy went to the table and sat down in a chair. “It’s been two days. I feel like I’m going out of my mind. I’m baking to stay busy.”

  Emma gasped as she sat down across from her. “What happened?”

  Mandy told her the entire story while drawing imaginary circles on the tabletop with her fingertip. When she finished, she looked up and found Hank sitting next to her, his attention focused on her.

  “What do you think, Hank?” Mandy rubbed the cat’s ear, and he tilted his head toward her and purred.

  “Hank and I think you shouldn’t give up.” Emma smiled at her. “The issues may be deeper than what you’re seeing on the surface. I think you’re feeling overwhelmed, and Ephraim is doubting the wisdom of marrying you because your suggestions may have made him feel less-than. If you take a step back and look at the whole picture, you might agree with me.”

  “So it’s all my fault?” Mandy felt as if the breath rushed out of her lungs at the possibility that she caused the breakup.

  “No, no, no.” Emma reached for her hands. “Your suggestions are mature. I commend you for wanting to slow down and not rush your wedding. Many young women are so obsessed with the wedding that they lose sight of what’s really important—their marriage. That’s your future. Taking your time and doing what’s right is a grown-up decision. But you also need to look at this from Ephraim’s perspective. He loves you so much he doesn’t want to wait to marry you. But he comes from a line of farmers. He might have taken your suggestions as an insult to the way of life his family has lived for many generations.”

  “So I need to forget the idea of living with my parents? And I was wrong to suggest that he learn a new trade?” Mandy’s heart ached as she recalled the pain and anger lining Ephraim’s handsome face when he told her their relationship was over.

  Emma touched one ribbon of her prayer covering and paused as if contemplating the correct response. “No, I don’t think you were wrong, but I believe he reacted out of hurt. Married to Henry, I learned I had to take his feelings into consideration, no matter how certain I was that my point of view was right. Two people make a marriage, and the only way it will work is if those two people listen to each other and compromise. Together you and Ephraim can find a solution. Just like our crops in Henry’s garden needed both sun and water, you two need to work together to nourish and grow your relationship.”

  “Oh.” Mandy’s thoughts were spinning so fast she thought she might pass out. Guilt and shame wrapped around her chest, squeezing at her lungs. “I was selfish and pushy when I insisted he consider my ideas, let alone just go along with them. I didn’t consider how he might feel.” Her bottom lip trembled. “What if he doesn’t forgive me?”

  “Everything will be fine, Mandy. You just need to talk to him, calmly.” Emma stood and retrieved the lemon bars from the counter. “These are positively scrumptious. Danki for sharing them with me.” She set the container in the center of the table and took another bar. “Talk to Ephraim and discuss your options. Also pray for him. Ask God to help him see that you do love him and want to marry him.” She smiled at Mandy. “Don’t give up hope. You and Ephraim can work it out, but you can only do it together.”

  “Okay.” If their hearts could get past the hurt.

  “Now, are we going to get started on canning today?”

  “Ya, I’m ready. And Katie Ann and Clara plan to be here a bit later.” Soon she and Emma were gathering supplies, and Tena came downstairs to join them. It felt good to talk and even laugh as they started canning the last of the beans, carrots, and corn they’d grown in the garden.

  When the back door opened and then clicked closed, Mandy turned her attention to the mudroom doorway.

  “Do I smell lemon bars?” Wayne asked.

  “Ya, Mandy made them,” Tena told him. “Come have one.”

  Wayne stepped into the kitchen, and Mandy’s stomach seemed to drop when Ephraim appeared behind him. He froze in the doorway as his striking brown eyes focused on hers. Then his lips formed a thin line, but his eyes seemed to plead with her. Did he want to fix things between them? Or did he want her to leave? She longed to read his mind as the intensity in his gaze sent goose bumps ripping up her arms.

  Wayne took a lemon bar from the container and took a big bite. After swallowing, he turned to Ephraim. “These are fantastic.” He held up his half-eaten bar. “You need to try one.”

  Ephraim took one from the container, bit into it, and nodded at Mandy. “It’s appeditlich.”

  “Danki.” Mandy cleared her throat as she tried to hide the sadness his formal tone caused her.

  Ephraim looked at Wayne. “We should get outside and start on our project.”

  “What project?” Tena asked.

  Wayne swiped another bar from the container. “We’re going to replace some of the boards on the shed doors. I want to get this done before it gets any colder.”

  When Mandy felt Ephraim’s stare burning into her, she kept her focus on Emma. “Why don’t we go through your cookbooks, Emma? We could find something fun to make when we’re finished canning.”

  “Wunderbaar.” Emma stood and turned to Wayne. “Danki for fixing the shed doors. Let me know what I owe you for supplies.”

  “It’s no problem.” Wayne held up his hand. Then he winked at Tena. “See you soon.”

  “Ya, you will.” Tena grinned at him, and the love that passed between them made Mandy’s heart crumble even more.

  Ephraim gave Mandy a brief glance and then walked out the back door with Wayne.

  “Am I missing something?” Tena asked Mandy after the men disappeared outside. “You and Ephraim were a bit cold to each other.”

  “I’ll tell you while we work.”

  “You’re telling me you broke up with Mandy because she suggested you wait a few months to get married, then move in with her parents, build a house on her dat’s land, and have the chance for a new career?” Wayne asked as they removed the old shed door from the hinges.

  “Ya, I guess that sums it up.” Ephraim shrugged.

  “Don’t you think you overreacted?” Wayne turned toward him.

  “No, I don’t.” Ephraim looked down at the rotten wood to avoid Wayne’s accusin
g stare. By this morning, he’d decided he hadn’t made a mistake. No matter what she said, deep down, Mandy was having doubts about their relationship. He was sure of it, but he didn’t want to tell Wayne that. “She knows I’ve always planned to be a farmer and take over mei dat’s farm someday.”

  “But plans can change,” Wayne said. “Isn’t being together the most important plan of all?”

  “Why don’t we stay focused on this repair instead of my breakup?” He pointed to the door.

  “Hey,” Jerry said as he and Chris approached. “Are we ready to work on the shed today?”

  Ephraim looked past them to where Katie Ann and Clara climbed the porch steps and headed into the house. Why didn’t his sister mention this was the canning day at Emma’s? In a matter of minutes, all the women would know he and Mandy had broken their engagement and ended their nearly one-year relationship.

  Why should he let Wayne make him feel guilty? Mandy was the one who suggested they change their plans. She was the one who was changing her mind about him. This was her fault, not his!

  But then why did he lie awake at night, analyzing their argument over and over? Why did he find himself contemplating what life would be like if he became a brickmason?

  “Ephraim?”

  “What?” He looked up at Jerry.

  “What has you so distracted?” Jerry asked, a grin tugging at his lips.

  “You haven’t heard?” Wayne asked. “Ephraim and Mandy broke up on Tuesday.”

  Ephraim swallowed a groan. Here we go. Now they’ll all analyze my life and tell me what I’ve done wrong.

  “Are you serious?” Jerry asked. “Katie Ann didn’t say anything on the ride over here.”

  “Katie Ann told me yesterday.” Chris frowned at Ephraim. “You’re honestly going to let her get away because you’re too stubborn to even consider living with her parents and working for her dat?”

  “That’s why you broke up?” Jerry asked.

  “Worse,” Wayne told him. “This all started just because Mandy suggested they delay the wedding a few months. She had gut reasons too.”

  “Look. This is my business.” Ephraim held up his hands. “I really don’t need your opinions.”

  “That’s too bad.” Jerry sat down on a plastic crate and looked up at him. “You’re going to get our opinions, so take them like a man.” His other friends mumbled their agreement. “Don’t you love her?”

  “Ya.” Ephraim leaned back against the shed. “Of course I do.”

  “Then why are you letting a little change of plans ruin your future with the maedel you love?”

  “A little change of plans?” Ephraim gestured widely. “Are you kidding me? Moving off my parents’ farm would be a huge change. And what do I know about being a brickmason?”

  “So you’re afraid to learn a new trade?” Jerry snorted. “Do you think I knew anything about being a plumber when I first went to work for mei onkel? Now I’m his assistant manager and working my way up to being his partner. You might like a career change.”

  “This farm has been in my family for generations. How can I walk away from that?” Ephraim demanded.

  “Darlene and her family moved in, and Uria can help run the farm now,” Chris said as he sat down beside Jerry. “It’s okay to learn a new trade, Ephraim. It’s all about finding stability for you and Mandy, and from what I hear, considering what might be best for your parents and older schweschder and her family too. Besides, you could take over her dat’s business someday. He has two dochdern, and you’ll be his first sohn.”

  “He’s right.” Wayne shrugged. “You need to think about what you’re gaining, not what you’re losing.”

  “That’s enough.” Ephraim threw down his tool. “I didn’t come here today for a lecture. I came here to work on this shed.”

  “And you wanted to see your ex-fiancée,” Wayne muttered.

  Ephraim spun and kicked the side of the shed, sending searing pain radiating from his toe up to his shin. “I didn’t know she’d be here today.”

  “I don’t think breaking your foot is going to fix things between you and Mandy,” Wayne quipped.

  “He’s right, Ephraim,” Jerry added. “You need to relax.”

  “Can we please fix these shed doors and stop analyzing my life?” He needed them to stop bugging him. How could he share the truth? He was afraid Mandy just didn’t love him enough to live on the farm with him, that she didn’t think he was worth what she considered a sacrifice. He didn’t want to admit how much that possibility hurt.

  “Fine, fine.” Jerry picked up a hammer. “Let’s give Ephraim a break.”

  As Ephraim turned his attention to the shed, his mind spun with his friends’ words and unsolicited advice. He looked toward the house and imagined Mandy sitting at the kitchen table, telling her friends about their breakup. Were they also giving her unsolicited advice? He tried to redirect his thoughts to the task at hand, but his mind lingered on Mandy and the pain he’d seen in her eyes this morning. Did she miss him as much as he missed her?

  Then why wouldn’t she just agree that their original plan to marry in December and live with his family was best?

  He shoved away the thoughts. She was the one who wanted to change their plans. This breakup was her fault.

  Still, his heart yearned for her.

  “Do you need a ride home?” Katie Ann asked Mandy as they pulled on their coats that afternoon.

  “Ya, I guess so. It would save me some money.” Mandy buttoned her coat. “Mei dat paid his driver to drop me off since he needed his horse and buggy today.”

  “You can ride with Chris and me.” Katie Ann gestured for Mandy to follow her.

  Mandy said good-bye to Emma, Clara, and Tena and then headed outside with Katie Ann. As they walked down the path to the waiting buggies, Mandy slowed her steps when she spotted Ephraim standing with Chris, remembering how uncomfortable he’d made everyone feel as they all gathered around Emma’s table for lunch.

  “It’s okay.” Katie Ann took Mandy’s arm and guided her toward the buggy. “You don’t have to feel awkward around him.”

  Mandy walked over to Chris’s buggy and climbed into the back.

  “I’ll see you later,” Chris told Ephraim.

  “All right.” Ephraim hesitated, but then he looked into the buggy.

  Mandy sucked in a breath as she took in his stoic expression. She lifted her hand to wave to him.

  With a frown, Ephraim nodded at her and then walked to his own horse and buggy.

  Mandy released the breath she’d been holding and then settled into the back of the buggy as Katie Ann and Chris climbed onto the bench seat in front of her.

  As Chris guided the buggy toward the road, she hugged her arms to her chest and recalled her conversation with her friends while they finished canning the vegetables. While they had all offered her kind encouragement and told her to pray and ask God to guide her heart, their words felt empty of hope. Of course she would pray, but she still felt like a third wheel sitting in the back of her best friend’s buggy while her ex-fiancé rode home alone. And Ephraim showed no signs of wanting to talk.

  Holding back tears, Mandy closed her eyes and asked God to somehow heal their broken relationship. She couldn’t do it by herself.

  CHAPTER 6

  As conversations swirled around him at the breakfast table Saturday morning, Ephraim scooped home fries onto his plate and then forked a few into his mouth.

  “Onkel Ephraim?”

  He looked to his left, where Rebekah sat. “Ya?”

  “Do you like potatoes?”

  “I do.” He couldn’t stop a grin as he pointed to his plate. “This is my second pile of home fries.”

  “Oh.” Rebekah scrunched her nose and then looked back at her eggs.

  “Why do you look so disgusted?” he asked.

  “Savannah says home fries are gross because potatoes grow in the ground and are dirty,” Rebekah said.

  “I didn’t say that!
” Savannah exclaimed from across the table.

  “Savannah!” Darlene scolded. “No yelling in the haus.”

  “I never said that,” Savannah hissed.

  “Ya, you did,” Rebekah retorted.

  “You know, your mammi washes the potatoes before she makes the home fries, so the potatoes aren’t dirty when we eat them.” Ephraim tried in vain to hide his smile.

  “Oh.” Rebekah tapped her finger against her chin as she considered this. “So they aren’t yucky when you eat them?”

  “No, they aren’t.” Ephraim scooped another mouthful onto his fork.

  “May I please have some?” Rebekah pushed her plate toward Ephraim.

  “Of course.” Ephraim shifted some onto her plate and then smiled at Darlene.

  “Maed.” Darlene rolled her eyes and then smiled at Uria.

  Ephraim stopped chewing as he watched his older sister and brother-in-law grin at each other. The adoration sparking between them stole his breath for a moment. Could he have had that same deep love and affection in marriage with Mandy? The thought felt like a bucket of frigid water drenching him after a long, hot shower.

  He turned his attention to his nieces. Would he and Mandy have had children? Would they have had daughters who were as beautiful as Mandy with her golden hair and stunning blue eyes? The potatoes soured in his mouth. How could he have let her slip through his fingers?

  “Ephraim, are you going to Emma’s today?” Katie Ann’s question cut through his thoughts and swelling regret.

  “Maybe later.” He lifted his glass of orange juice. “I have chores to do first.”

  “Chris is going to pick me up in about an hour,” Katie Ann said. “Maybe I’ll see you there.”

  Ephraim nodded. Part of him wanted to avoid Emma’s so he didn’t have to see Mandy, but another part of him wanted to go to Emma’s every day to sneak a glimpse at Mandy. When would he stop feeling so confused?

  When he was finished with his meal, he carried his dishes to the counter. Then he pulled on his hat, coat, and boots in the mudroom and headed out to the barn.