A Place at Our Table Read online

  “What’s on your mind?” His question was timid, as if he dreaded the answer.

  She fingered the strap on her purse as she considered her response. She wanted to be honest, but how could she tell him she was afraid of another breakup?

  He stopped walking and faced her. “Kayla, you are very important to me. I’m sorry about last night. Please forgive me?” His eyes pleaded with her, and something inside of her melted.

  “Of course I forgive you.”

  “Are you still my girlfriend?”

  “Ya.” She smiled as the tension in her spine released. “I would never give up on you that easily.”

  His jaw muscles visibly loosened. “Danki.”

  “Gern gschehne. We can talk more later.” She pointed toward the farmers market. “I need to do this shopping and hurry back to the restaurant before it gets busy again.”

  “I understand.” He held out his hand, and she took it. “Let’s go.”

  They made small talk as they picked up the items on her shopping list. After she paid for the groceries and supplies, they carried the bags back to the restaurant.

  “Danki for your help,” she said as they stepped inside, this time through the back door. She set her bags on a counter in the supply room off the kitchen and he laid his bags beside hers.

  “Gern gschehne, Kayla. I had a gut time.”

  “You had a gut time shopping?” She lifted an eyebrow.

  “Anytime with you is a gut time.” He opened his mouth to say more but was cut off by his radio.

  “All available units respond to accident with injuries at Old Philadelphia Pike at North Ronks Road,” the voice said.

  “I have to go.” He touched her arm. “I’m sorry.”

  “When will I see you again?” She hated the whine in her voice.

  “How about tomorrow night?” he asked, raising his voice to be heard over the radio repeating the call.

  “Ya, that would be fine.”

  “Great. I look forward to seeing you again.” He squeezed her hand.

  “Be safe!” she called after him.

  “I will!” he responded just before the door clicked shut behind him.

  Kayla wanted to believe he would keep his promise to see her tomorrow night and relieve the doubts that taunted her heart.

  TWENTY-THREE

  “The animals are fed,” Jamie announced as he stepped into the kitchen the following evening.

  “Are you going to see Kayla now?” Laura stood at the counter, drying the dinner dishes.

  “Ya.” Jamie started up the stairs.

  “You’d better hurry,” she called after him. “It’s getting late.”

  “I know, but I need to get cleaned up.” He hurriedly grabbed clean clothes from his room before getting into the shower. After he shaved and dressed, he rushed down the hallway toward the stairs.

  The crackle of his radio made him freeze.

  “All available units respond to 1742 Beechdale Road, Bird-in-Hand, seventy-four-year-old man,” the voice over the radio blared. “Chest pains. Possible heart attack.”

  “1742 Beechdale Road,” he whispered as he rushed into his room and retrieved the radio from his nightstand. That was right up the street.

  The call came through again. “All available units respond to 1742 Beechdale Road, Bird-in-Hand, seventy-four-year-old man . . .”

  He sprang into action. Gripping the radio, he ran down the stairs and through the kitchen toward the back door, nearly knocking Mark over as he stepped into the mudroom.

  “Whoa!” Mark held up his hands. “Slow down. Where’s the fire?”

  “Medical call up the street,” Jamie explained. “A man is having a heart attack. I have to help.” He slipped past Mark and out the door.

  “Jamie! Jamie, wait!” Mark rushed after him. “You said you were going to see Kayla tonight.”

  “I can see her later. I have to help this man.” He dashed toward the road on foot.

  “Jamie!” Mark yelled after him. “Even if you answer every single call it won’t bring Mamm back!”

  Jamie gritted his teeth and kept running.

  Kayla stood up from the glider and walked to the end of the porch. The sky was dark, and the only sounds were the singing cicadas and the rumble of engines from cars on nearby roads.

  Still no sign of Jamie. Where was he? She pushed away thoughts of his being hurt. Maybe he had decided something else was more important to him tonight. Or maybe he forgot about her.

  Or maybe he was hurt.

  She picked up the lantern from the porch railing. Worry mixed with frustration shoved her off the porch and sent her hustling to the phone shanty, hoping for a voice mail message. She dialed the number and the electronic voice said, “You have no new messages.”

  She closed her eyes and released a long, shaky breath. Where was he and why didn’t he call her to tell her he was okay? What if he wasn’t okay? But if something had happened to him, wouldn’t Laura have called?

  What if he was in an accident and Laura is too distraught to call me?

  The thought sent gooseflesh surging down her arms.

  No, no, no. Jamie has to be fine. He’s probably just busy with his family. They’ve endured a lot of heartache lately. He needs my patience and grace. And I have to believe he wouldn’t forget his promise.

  Swallowing back the lump swelling in her throat, she made her way back to the house. Her mother was writing on a notepad at the kitchen table.

  Mamm looked up and smiled. “Is Jamie here?”

  “No.” Kayla turned off the lantern and set it on the counter. “He didn’t show up and he didn’t leave me a message this time. I don’t know what to think or believe.”

  “Oh.” Mamm’s smile dissolved. “Maybe something came up.”

  “Maybe.”

  “Sit down.” Mamm’s voice was gentle.

  Kayla sank into the chair beside her. “Are you making a shopping list?”

  “Ya, but that’s not what I want to discuss.” Mamm touched Kayla’s hand. “Talk to me. What are you feeling right now?”

  Kayla set her elbows on the table and rested her chin on her palms. “I’m frustrated, but I’m trying to give Jamie the benefit of the doubt. I’m worried something happened to him or he and his family are having a hard time tonight. I know I need to be patient and give him time to heal after losing his mamm, but there’s something else bothering me too.”

  “What is it, mei liewe?”

  “When he apologized for not coming last night, he said he truly cares about me. But I don’t understand why he wouldn’t at least call tonight if he can’t make it. After all, he did the other night. Why not tonight?” She cringed. “Does that sound terrible?”

  Mamm paused as if contemplating Kayla’s words. “I believe Jamie does care about you very much. I think he will have an explanation.”

  “I’m sure he will, but it still hurts.”

  “Why?”

  Kayla paused. Should she be honest or keep her fears to herself?

  “Kayla, you can talk to me. I’ll listen without judgment.” Mamm’s eyes were warm and comforting.

  “I know I shouldn’t believe the worst about Jamie. He’s a gut man. But I still remember the humiliating feeling of sitting on the porch and waiting for Abram to come, only to find out he chose his freinden over me. I promised myself I would never do that again. What if Jamie is choosing something over me? If not his freinden, then something else?”

  “I understand what you’re saying, but Jamie isn’t Abram.” Mamm took Kayla’s hand in hers and gave it a gentle squeeze. “You do need to give him the benefit of the doubt. His family is going through a tough time. What if his daed needed someone to talk to and Jamie was there at the right time? You would understand that, wouldn’t you?”

  Guilt, hot and stinging, sliced through Kayla’s chest. “Ya, of course I would. We know firsthand how hard it is to lose someone.”

  “Exactly. You shouldn’t make a judgment until
you’ve heard the entire story. Jamie went out of his way to visit you at the restaurant yesterday. I believe he was genuine.” Mamm released her hand. “Wait and see what Jamie has to say and then decide if he’s not the man for you.”

  “Okay.” She cupped her hand against a yawn.

  “You’re exhausted. Why don’t you go to bed? You’ll feel better in the morning.”

  Kayla stood and pushed her chair in. “Are you going to bed?”

  “Soon. I just want to make a list of everything we’re running low on at the restaurant. You picked up the most urgent supplies yesterday, but I’m going to need to go shopping again soon.” Mamm looked up at her. “I’ll go shortly. We have church in the morning, so we both need our sleep.”

  Kayla started toward the stairs, but then turned and faced her mother again. “Danki for talking with me.”

  “You know you’re always welcome. I enjoy our talks.”

  “I do too. Ich liebe dich, Mamm.”

  Mamm smiled. “Ich liebe dich, mei liewe.”

  As Kayla climbed the stairs, her heart turned to the Riehl family. She couldn’t imagine not having her mother’s love and support when she needed someone to listen and offer advice.

  “Let’s stop in at the Dienners’ restaurant before we go to the hardware store,” Jamie said to Mark as they rode in their driver’s van. He turned to the driver. “Would that be all right, Blake?”

  “That sounds fine to me.” Blake steered into the restaurant’s parking lot. “I need to get a few things at the farmers market anyway. We can meet in the hardware store parking lot.”

  “Perfect.” Jamie took a deep breath. He hoped he could find the right words to apologize to Kayla for missing another date.

  They decided to meet in an hour, and as soon as the van came to a stop, Jamie leaped out and hurried toward the entrance.

  “What’s the rush?” Mark jogged to catch up with him.

  “I need to talk to Kayla and we don’t have much time. I haven’t talked to her since Friday. Remember? I had to go on that medical call Saturday night. I have to tell her why I missed our date.”

  “Are you saying you didn’t call to tell her why you didn’t show up?”

  “No, I didn’t.” Jamie reached for the door, but his brother pulled his arm back. “What are you doing, Mark?”

  “Today is Monday,” Mark spoke slowly as if Jamie might not be able to understand the language.

  “I realize that.”

  Mark held his hands up as if to surrender. “Don’t you think she’s going to be upset and feel like you forgot about her? Why didn’t you call her and explain what happened?”

  “I meant to, but I didn’t get home until late Saturday night and I just fell into bed. Then we had visitors all day yesterday, and like you and our schweschdere, I was keeping a close eye on Dat.” Irritation bubbled up inside of him. “That’s why we’re here now. I can tell Kayla what happened and apologize. Hopefully she’ll understand.”

  When Mark frowned, Jamie spun toward the door and pulled it open. He stepped into the lobby, where an English couple stood waiting for a table. The dining room was filled with customers and the delicious aroma of breakfast foods.

  Eva waved at Jamie and Mark before leading the couple away.

  “There she is,” Mark said under his breath.

  Jamie looked across the restaurant where Kayla spoke to some customers at a table near the kitchen. She nodded as she wrote on her notepad. Then she turned and walked toward the kitchen. Eva came up behind her and put her hand on Kayla’s shoulder. Eva whispered something in Kayla’s ear and Kayla’s shoulders stiffened. She turned toward the front of the restaurant and looked at Jamie. When their gazes clashed, her lips tightened. And then she looked away.

  “She looks upset,” Mark said.

  Jamie glared at Mark, who held up his hands and took a step back. Then Jamie looked back at Kayla as anxiety churned in his gut. Mark was right; Jamie should have made time to call her. He made a huge mistake and now he had to convince her to forgive him—again. His throat dried at the thought of losing her.

  “I don’t think she wants to talk to you,” Mark muttered under his breath.

  Jamie cupped his hand to the back of his neck as the weight of his mistakes made him mute. Was he too late? Had he lost her for good this time?

  “You’d better make it clear you’re sorry.” Mark jammed his thumb toward the front door. “Do you want me to wait outside?”

  “No.” Jamie shook his head. “You can stay.”

  Mark raised his eyebrows. “For emotional support?”

  Maybe. Jamie swiveled back to where Eva and Kayla were still talking. He could see Kayla’s expression, and it was anything but friendly. After a few moments, Kayla handed Eva her notepad and Eva disappeared into the kitchen. Kayla ambled toward the podium.

  “Gude mariye.”

  “Gude mariye, Kayla.”

  “I’m glad to see you’re okay. I thought something might have happened to you.”

  Jamie’s shoulders hunched. “I’m sorry for worrying you.”

  She took two menus from under the stand. “May I seat you for breakfast?” She kept her eyes focused on Mark as she spoke.

  “No, actually,” Jamie said, his voice sounding more confident than he felt, “I’d like to talk to you.”

  “This really isn’t a gut time.” She gestured toward the dining room. “As you can see, I’m very busy.”

  “I know that, but I only need a few minutes.” Jamie rested his hands on the podium. “I promise it won’t take long.”

  Mark took a step back. “Jamie, I’m going to go to the hardware store. I’ll meet you there. It was nice seeing you, Kayla.”

  Jamie kept his eyes trained on her. “Please, Kayla. I want to apologize about Saturday night.”

  “Why didn’t you call to tell me you weren’t coming?” Her voice was thick. “I was afraid you might have been injured.”

  “I’m so sorry.” He folded his hands as if to beg for her forgiveness. “I never meant to worry you like that.”

  “Then I was worried about your family.” Her voice shook. “I just didn’t know what to think.” The pain in her voice stabbed at his gut.

  “I should have called you.” He reached for her, but she took a step back.

  A couple sitting at a table behind her turned and looked at Jamie, their eyebrows raised as they stared.

  “Let’s go somewhere to talk in private, okay?” He worked to keep his voice low. “People are looking at us.”

  “Let them stare. I have nothing to hide. What happened Saturday night?”

  “I wasn’t in an accident, and my family is fine.” He sighed. “As I was leaving for your haus, a medical call came over my radio for an elderly man who lives on my street. He was having chest pains, so I ran over to stabilize him until the EMTs arrived. He was pretty scared, so I stayed while the EMTs checked him out and prepared him for transport. Then I told his fraa I’d check on their animals for them before I went home so she could go to the hospital without having to worry about them. I guess they don’t have any family around, and their neighbors didn’t seem to be home.”

  Her eyes widened. “Was he all right?”

  He nodded. “Ya, he had a mild heart attack. I talked to his fraa yesterday, and he’s going to be okay.”

  “Gut. What a blessing.” She studied him for a moment and then her expression hardened again. “So you weren’t even on duty, but you responded to a call. Why didn’t you at least phone and explain what happened? If not Saturday, then sometime yesterday.”

  “I’m so sorry. I really am. Please forgive me.”

  “You still haven’t answered my question.” Her voice rose, and the people sitting behind her continued to stare. “Why didn’t you call?”

  Guilt and regret dug their claws into him. “You’re right. I should have called you.”

  “Why didn’t you?” Her voice was small, sounding like an unsure child.

 
He rubbed at a knot in his shoulder. “First I was focused on trying to save that man and helping his fraa. When I got home, it was late and I was completely worn-out. And then yesterday members of our church district came to see how we’re doing without Mamm. We had visitors all day, and I was concerned about how Dat would handle talking about Mamm.” He paused and took a deep breath. “Kayla, I’m sorry I got involved in a medical call, but that doesn’t mean I forgot about you. I really care about you.”

  “I know you and your family are going through a lot right now, and I’m very sorry. But I have to tell you how I really feel.” Her voice trembled. “Why should I believe you want to have a true relationship with me if you didn’t let me know you weren’t going to make it? I feel like I don’t matter to you, no matter what you say now.”

  “That’s not true at all.” His answer came out with more force than he expected, and she jumped with a start. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to yell. I do want to have a relationship with you. Please give me another chance.”

  Her hesitation sliced at his soul. “I don’t know. I’ve already had my heart broken once. I don’t need it broken again.”

  “Please don’t compare me to Abram.” He reached for her, and she took a step back. “I will make this up to you.”

  “How?”

  “I have to go to the hardware store and finish up chores today. What if I come back to see you at closing?”

  The bell on the door rang and a group of five English women stepped into the restaurant.

  “See, Lola,” one of the women said. “I told you this was an Amish restaurant.”

  “Please,” Jamie pleaded, lowering his voice in an attempt to keep their conversation private. “Give me another chance. Let me come see you tonight.”

  Kayla glanced past him and smiled at the women behind him. “Good morning. Welcome to Dienner’s Family Restaurant. I’ll be with you in a moment.”

  She briefly turned her focus back to him. “Fine. Be here at closing.” She bent, picked up three more menus, and smiled brightly as she addressed the women. “Table for five?” She stepped away from him and led the women away.

  Jamie went outside and found Mark sitting on a bench.